Tough memories

I had to write a personal narrative essay for my English class. The essay needed to be something that has changed us as a person. I have had many things that have changed me and defined who I was throughout my life, but nothing more than the birth of Kadence. I thought it would be so simple to write 4 pages about her struggle in the beginning. I mean to cram a month into 4 pages seemed like it would be so easy. I was very wrong. It was so hard to express my feelings and I never knew how much I have actually hidden from everyone....including myself. As I wrote, it was almost therapeutic. I have always felt I needed to be strong, but never realized how much I was truly going through inside. I am so appreciative of all my family who helped David and myself through one of the toughest times of our lives. Most importantly I am grateful for everyone who helped Kadence. She had so much love and support from family and I know that is what helped her stay strong. I am also thankful for Kadence who taught me that no matter the odds placed against you, the choice is up to you. You can always be determined to prove the Dr's wrong. I am so grateful for my family and the love and support that is there. Thanks!

Yay

So at the end of yesterdays blog I was hoping for a happier Kadence and I got her! She slept really well last night and only got up a few times. She still isn't quite up to par, but she is improving and becoming more herself. Right now she is at the stage where she feels better enough to know she doesn't feel well. Although it is hard because she cries a lot, she is doing tons better. Her meltdowns don't last near as long, she is drinking and eating better than yesterday, and she is off the couch more often to play. I am so excited that she is finally feeling a little better. I know it will be better in the long run to have had this done, but we picked a bad time to do it. Why didn't we do it in the summer when we didn't have school and work? I guess we just like to make our lives a little more complicated. :)

On the mend

Kadence had her tonsils out on Friday and it went pretty well. Before any surgery or procedure where you will get anesthesia, you of course have to fast. Normally Kadence does really well, but this time was the exception. She woke up at 12:30 and cried and cried.....and cried. She slept off and on, but mommy didn't get more than an hour of sleep.

We arrived at the hospital, and I haven't ever seen anybody have such a hard time figuring out her name. From check-in to nurse to nurse, it seemed like her name changed. Of course we got Joy as her first name but I am used to that. We also got E as her first name. I don't understand why they didn't know that that was her middle initial and was getting frustrated. The anesthesiologist came to talk to us and he made me feel very very comfortable. I hate that you can choose your Dr, but not your anesthesiologist. I think both are equally important and I love that this one made Kadence, David and I feel comfortable. They took her back and Kadence didn't even cry! She did tell the nurse all about how if she was brave she would get a present though, so I think the bribe worked very well.

David and I ran to eat while she was in surgery because we were starving. I hate leaving her because I always feel like something will go wrong once I leave. I made David shovel it in so we could rush back to the waiting room. The surgery only took about 20 minutes and the Dr said it couldn't have gone any better. He said her tonsils were huge and her throat is tiny. He also said that her adenoids had so much tissue attached to them that he thinks she couldn't breath very well because of it.

Kadence got back to the room and watched her new movie (her bribe) and ate a popsicle. She didn't eat very much and was restless. She told me she needed to go potty and I was very surprised to see that she wasn't wet. After the anesthesia, I was sure she would have an accident so I put a pull up on her just in case. I think that is the true test and feel I can now say she is officially potty trained. After the two hours of observation had passed, we asked her if she was ready to home. She said, "No, I'll stay." The nurses thought that was so funny. We told her that when we got home, grandpa and grandma would come visit she rushed out the door without us.

Kadence did really well the first night except for a few minor breakdowns and slept well most of the night. Since then, it has been a little more rough. I had to sleep with her in the recliner the second night and we have been fighting with her to get her to eat or drink anything. I usually can trick her into anything, but nothing is working this time. She is still urinating, so she must be drinking enough. I just worry she will get dehydrated.

Today her mood is a little better although she still isn't eating or drinking much. She has played a little more and told me she wants to go on a walk and also wants to blow bubbles with daddy when he gets home. She also woke up without a fever which she has had since the surgery. I hope this means she is on the mend, because it is breaking my heart to see her so sick. (Not to mention I am falling way behind in school.) Nap didn't go well today, and she ended up needing to rock with me in the recliner instead. I will keep everyone updated and hopefully next blog will have a much happier Kadence in it.

Surgery

Although Kadence has a cold, the Dr said it is alright to go ahead with the surgery. So on Friday she will be getting her tonsils and adenoids removed. I am unusually nervous with this for some reason. She has been put under anesthesia so many times and it has gone well, so it doesn't make much sense. This is less risky than her being casted which should comfort me, but for some reason I can't shake the thought of something going wrong. It is kind of nice in a way because I tell her I love her more, rock her more often and make hugs last longer. When you have a fear dealing with your child I think it makes you realize how much your children mean to you. I love both my girls so much and can't imagine life without them. We have already stocked up on soup, jello, juice, and applesauce. We will be going tomorrow to let Kadence pick out the popsicles of her choice. We also will be finding out the time of the surgery tomorrow. I am hoping it is close to morning so she doesn't have to fast as long, but she does pretty well for a 3 year old. David has taken the day off to be with us at the hospital and David's parents are watching Shelby. I am glad it is on a Friday so that David can help over the weekend. I am excited to have this over with and have Kadence feeling better, sleeping better and breathing better. Wish us luck, I will post on Friday while she is recovering.

The things kids say

I figured I would let everyone into the mind of Kadence. She says some pretty funny things and I have no idea where she comes up with it. Here are a few examples:

(Driving home from Sams Club)
Kadence: I'm going to chase them!
Mommy: Who are you going to chase?
Kadence: The boys mommy!


(After David gave her a new pencil)
Kadence: Mom daddy made me so happy
Mommy: I'm glad you like your pencil.
Kadence: It made my heart feel good!

(While going potty)
Mommy: Kadence don't watch it
Kadence: Will it get in my eye!?
Mommy: No just all over the seat.
She was really worried though.

(While playing 'baby' at Grandmas)
Jeff: I'm a big baby and have a messy diaper, Grandma better change me!
Grandma: I think Kadence should change you.
Kadence: No! Shelby can do it.

(While dancing in the living room)
Kadence: I'm going to be a ballerina and everyone will watch me on stage!!
Luckily we already have her ballerina costume for Halloween.