Friday Confessional

I CONFESS...I have an obsession with the way my toenails are painted. I try hard (although being a mom it doesn't always happen) to keep them from looking as though they have grown out. Chipped toenail polish drives me absolutely crazy! Even while pregnant I would paint my toenails. It was QUITE the process too. Those who saw how gigantic I was know what a task it was. My belly grows straight out when I am pregnant and I literally look like I have a basketball under my shirt. It was a 6 step process. I would remove the polish from one foot, take a break, remove polish from the other foot, take a break, then apply polish to each foot with a break in the middle and finally I would add sparkles to each foot with a break in the middle. It took me FOREVER but it drove me insane if they went too long. David even offered to paint them for me, but I politely (AND not so politely) declined numerous times.

I CONFESS...I have two of the most amazing kids I know. They are SO well behaved most of the time and get along so great together. I can go shopping without wondering if they will behave, we can go to eat without wondering if we will be asking for to-go boxes at the same time as when they bring our food, I can go mow the lawn and come back to them playing nicely together, and usually I can shower without a disruption. They have their moments, but they are seriously the best kids. I don't know how we got so lucky, but I am sure glad we got the girls we did!

I CONFESS...That today I have really been struggling with Kadence's trials. I sometimes feel bad for myself for having to go through it, but most of the time I just feel bad for her. Today has been one of those days. As if having her get a brace she doesn't love wasn't bad enough, today when I gave her a bath I realized it was rubbing a huge sore on her leg that was bruised and gross. Did she complain? Not a single time. I feel terrible. She is such a tough little thing and just takes each trial with a smile. As I dropped her off at school I told the teacher she wouldn't be there on Monday because we had to schedule a quick visit to Orthotics to try and fix her brace. She then explained to me that Kadence told her all about getting her cast off and then said, "Then they put this brace on and it hurts REALLY bad." Mrs. Jill said, "You don't like your brace very much?" Kadence said, "I LOVE my brace!" I just about lost it. She never ever complains about the pain, and just has the most positive little outlook on life. I think anyone who has met Kadence can see her true genuine happiness. I don't know why she never complains about her pain, but it seriously breaks my heart. I often wonder why she has to go through all of this, and as most mothers I wish I could trade her places. I hate seeing all her bruises that are left all over her from her cast, all the broken down skin, all the scars, and the horrible rash she always gets after her cast is removed. I hate seeing my baby go through such a trial, but I am so grateful she is so strong. It makes it a little easier for me to see her strength and I hope one day I can have half as much strength and happiness as her. She's my rock who keeps me grounded and Shelby is my firecracker who keeps me on my toes. (My painted toes)

I CONFESS...I like driving in the car by myself. I turn the radio up really loud and sing my little heart out. I'm sure I look ridiculous, but its almost therapeutic for me. The music changes depending on my mood, but I love it. I try to do it when the girls are in the car, but they either tell me I'm giving them a headache or beg for the Tangled soundtrack.