Wordy Wednesday...Again, on Thursday.

I'm so sorry that I never get the Wordy Wednesday post done on Wednesday, I almost should start calling it Wordy Thursday but it doesn't quite roll off the tongue. This weeks Wordy Wednesday prompt was: Trials

I once heard that God gives more trials to those who he can trust to handle them well. I often joke that God must REALLY trust me. I don't know that there's any truth to that, but it does offer me comfort when I am at a low point. I have gone through life with a relative amount of trials, each of which I have learned something from. In the last 5 years I have gone through an incredible amount of trials...almost one after another...and I have not only learned from them, but grown a great deal from them. I didn't really notice how much I have grown until I was helping my mother during my grandmas last days. Five years ago I wouldn't have gone into the nursing home let alone gone daily. I wouldn't have stayed longer than a few minutes, and I definitely wouldn't have gone when they were just waiting for her to die. I don't like seeing people in pain, people who are sad, or people who are suffering. It absolutely breaks my heart. I feel that sometimes being blessed with a big heart can sometimes be a trial in itself. Why the change? I have learned how much the support means. I have been in situations when I have had no choice but to see people hurting, people sad, and stay the night in the dreaded hospital. (I HATE hospitals) I know how empty it feels to sit alone and how helpless you feel. I know how much all of my families support meant to me. I also know what it felt like to have a lack of support from people I thought I could lean on. I never want to be that person. I want to be someone everyone can count on. I want to be the person people call in the middle of the night when they feel they have nowhere else to turn. Five years ago I would have cared, but not enough to get up and do something about it. I'm thankful for my trials. (Of course not always while I'm going through them) I've seen how close it has made David and me in our marriage. I've seen how it has changed my view on life. I have a different outlook and try hard not to take the little things for granted. I kiss my girls often, I take time to read to them, to laugh with them, and to rock them beside their beds. I make sure I get over any hard feelings I have because life is too short to be angry. I have changed so much in such a short amount of time and I am so grateful. I wouldn't want to trade lives with anyone because I would still be that immature girl nobody could rely on. I wouldn't value the worth of every soul, and look at people for who they truly are instead of the way they behave. I try really hard to live without regret. Trials just plain ol' suck, but in the end they are usually worth it.